Ever get that not so fresh feeling?

What a weekend. Jeremy finally took a few days off, and this work widow got some quality, holiday time in!!! We filled our weekend hours with great friends, good food, Manischewitz, Yankee Gift Exchange, tackiest Christmas lights this side of the Mississippi, and....a scrappy girl fight with Vagisil between me and the hostess/my Matron of Honor/BESTIE on her kitchen floor to end Saturday night's Hampden holiday party. It wouldn't have been right to close down the party without a girl fight in Hampden. Lets be honest.

Not familiar with Hampden? Here's a little background:
Hampden was originally settled as a residential community for workers at the mills that had sprung up along the Jones Falls; its first residents were in place well before the area was annexed to Baltimore City in 1889. Many of its residents came to the area from the hill country of Kentucky, West Virginia, and western Pennsylvania, due to the abundance of jobs the mills provided. This influx cemented the image of the neighborhood for the decades that followed as both primarily white and working-class.
Source: Wikipedia (where else?)

Jump to the Christmas Lights: 
Hampden's 34th Street celebrates the Christmas
holiday every year with the "Miracle on 34th Street" where home owners on both sides of the street decorate their houses with thousands of lights and Christmas decorations, including hubcap and record trees, giant robots (clearly Jeremy's fave), crab santa steering the crab reindeer draw sleigh, etc. All in true Bmore fashion! Visitors from all over the world are attracted by the over-the-topness to see the spectacle. It's really an amazing effort put forth by these locals (not to mention the BGE bills! Holy Hannah!!!).  I'm sure you have to sign some sort of agreement before settling on one of these 34th street row homes, pinky swearing over the Christmas spirit itself, that you'll participate each and every year. And when you're tired of it? You have to move. If you dropped the ball for even one year and didn't put up your 8, singing, life size, glowing reindeer with matching Santa and Elves on your roof, you'd probably be drawn and quartered. That's how serious this is taken. You need a break? You better get out of town, permanently, and quick!



Sara and Kyle's annual "White Trash Christmas Party" revolves around this tradition of lights. Each year we bundle up, fill up our 'to-go' hot spiked cider cups and make our way to 34th street as one big mob. We lose some on the way (like my husband who this year decided to go to the nearest bar for a Grande Mariner shot with his bromance, Zon. Figures.).  Some decide to stay back at the house as well (lazy bags 'o bones), and perhaps start rooting through the Yankee Christmas gifts, which is the second part of the "Tallski's" annual holiday get together -- a gift exchange. I call cheating!!!!!

This leads us back to the Vagisil. Not a favor that generally makes it's way to most parties (nor should it be used as a deep conditioning treatment). But when there are yankee gifts involved, anything goes. This year, for instance, I got homegrown, canned jalapenos (amazing!) and....a roll of toilet paper, for the aftermath :)

Left (Red Corner): Sara Russell, "MOH";
Right (Blue Corner): Emily Martin, Bride

Jump to the girl fight:
Having my face in the linoleum and feminine ointment dreaded through the back of my head was a new experience, not only for me, but all party-goers I'm pretty sure. Our husbots stood aside shaking their heads at each other, wondering why they even proposed in the first place. And what had they done wrong to deserve this? Listen mens...we all have choices...and you should consider yourselves LUCKY. After a few minutes of struggle, we gained control and/or got tired (the tube was empty anyway), and called it a truce. I'm pretty sure Sara won though. She's a strapping 5'10" -- she's got a full 8" on my punie self! See for yourself to the right -------->

Great party this year, guys. Always a success!  I leave you with one note of CAUTION, Russells: Linoleum floors may be slippery when covered in Vagisil.

Text/Quote of the evening:
Kyle Russell: Your dumb drunk wife left her phone on my dumb drunk wife's couch.
Jeremy Martin: Sounds about right. Be by later.